You Can’t Make Everyone Happy: You’re Not Pizza

You Can’t Make Everyone Happy: You’re Not Pizza
When it comes to the business of comedy and running restaurants, comedian Eric Wareheim discovers they’re more similar than you’d think.
by Shawna Wagman Feb 11, 2025 — 6 min read
You Can’t Make Everyone Happy: You’re Not Pizza

About this series

Running A Restaurant Is No Joke

Running A Restaurant Is No Joke

Follow along as comedian and entrepreneur Eric Wareheim goes under the hood of restaurant kitchens and into the messy back offices and walk-in fridges — not just to see how food is made, but how profits are made.
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Eric Wareheim was compensated for his time and participation by Square.

We interviewed actor, wine industry entrepreneur, and NYT bestselling cookbook author Eric Wareheim after he partnered with Square on a masterclass in making it big in restaurants. Eric is obsessed with food and wine; he travels to find the best restaurants in the world. And he was genuinely stoked to take on the assignment: spending time with three very experienced chefs and operators to learn as much as possible about how to make money and how to make the business work. Check out the four-part video series Running a Restaurant is No Joke

Q: Let’s dive in. As a comedian who is dead serious about good food and wine, you have a unique perspective on restaurants. Where do you see the overlap with your world as a writer and performer? 

Wareheim: Yeah, deep down, comedy writing comes from within you, and you can take inspiration from your surroundings and people and things you’ve watched. But truly, to have a good comedy bit or a show or a good restaurant or a dish, I think the jokes and the dishes have to be unique and have to come from a real place. You can really tell when it’s not. That’s exactly why comedy and the food business are linked because it is so personal in every way. And you have to obviously work so hard and so long at it before you can present it to people. And with the percentages of success rate, there are very few comedians and comedy shows out there that get made and are good. And the same with restaurants. I mean, there are tons of good restaurants, but there’s a handful of great restaurants.

I think a slice of pizza and a joke are the exact same thing. They’re something everyone wants and everyone needs, and for a moment you’re not in reality; you’re transported. ”

Q: It feels like laughter and food both serve as essential escapes for so many of us. How do you see your role as someone who does a lot of cooking for people as well as serving up the laughs? 

Wareheim: I really learned this when we were in the pandemic, and I turned to food. I trained with a lot of my friends and other chefs on how to make pizza, and how to make it really good. I tested it on my friends, night after night and week after week. I loved the feeling of working hard on the dough or whatever it was, the beef bourguignon, and giving it to them and seeing their emotion of being satiated. I think a slice of pizza and a joke are the exact same thing. They’re something everyone wants and everyone needs, and for a moment, you’re not in reality; you’re transported. It’s this act of giving, which I didn’t really think about how comedy was giving, but it really is. It’s just a feel-good thing.

Q: How do you think about timing when it comes to comedy and landing a joke? 

Wareheim: Timing’s everything in a restaurant. That’s one of the most complicated things that I have not cracked yet. It’s like when there’s a packed restaurant, how do they get all the elements at one time? It’s wild respect.

Q: What’s your process for tweaking a joke until it feels just right? How do you know you’ve achieved the perfect balance? 

Wareheim: This is a great question because I’m guilty of editing things to death. I think it’s because I started as a director and an actor, editor, and producer. I did everything. When you have unlimited time to edit, you kind of get used to it. But in real life, in a restaurant, time is money, and you have to figure that out. Especially when you’re on a TV show, you can’t just edit things to death. You have to find a balance where you’re happy, but you also understand that, yes, it could be refined, but there’s a point when you have to walk away. And it’s hard finding that, it takes years. But once you do find it, it’s good. I mean, it takes a certain level of confidence.

Q: What’s your process for tweaking a recipe until it feels just right? 

Wareheim: Same thing. I mean, when I did my first cookbook, I’d take cooking so seriously because I knew the recipes would actually be used. I developed the recipes, I tested them, and I tested them again. Then, I had other people test them. I think a lot of it has to do with your peers — people that you trust. Who do you really trust that knows comedy? Or who do you really trust that knows food? And if they’re loving it, then you got a winner.

Q: How do you stay in tune with your audience, whether in comedy or food? What strategies do you use to keep your content fresh and relevant? 

Wareheim: Part of me doesn’t care, and that’s not because I don’t care about my audience, but it’s because I want to stay true to myself and my experiences and what I’m into right now. Sometimes. those things change quickly. But things that are really important to you stay deep in your soul, and those are the things that I think are important to communicate to your audience. I’ve never been someone who follows trends or anything, so that’s how I do it.

Q: Taste is something that’s subjective, and that’s true for both comedy and food. Do you find that to be a challenging part of your work? 

Wareheim: Luckily, I started my career with a show that pretty much had no creative notes, and Tim Heidecker and I could go pretty wild. We got the best advice from our mentor, Bob Odenkirk, who said, ‘Don’t work in anyone else’s writer’s room. Do Tim and Eric as long as you can. This is special.’ We didn’t understand what that meant until we started working with other people and other networks and studios and realized, wow, that was an amazing moment where we could be totally free. That’s similar to when you go to a restaurant and you’re eating someone’s food, and you’re like, wow, that’s different than the basic version of this. And you can tell who the chef is. I’m always talking about restaurants that have a voice. Same with comedy. It’s important, and it affects people deeper when you can tell who it’s coming from.

Q: Are there any particular tricks or techniques you’ve learned over the years that helped you succeed in both comedy and the world of food and wine? 

Wareheim: Yes. I think being real is very important. Audiences are very smart, and they can see if you’re just trying to make a buck or trying to dip your toe into something. Going from comedy to winemaking was challenging because, in the world of comedy, I would make fun of food all the time. It was just fun to do that, and then I had to convince people this wine’s actually good! So it’s all about putting in the work. With social media, you can actually see if someone’s putting in the work or not. I never was a person who wanted to just put my face on something. Same with the cookbook. I worked way too hard on it, but it was such a personal project, and I wanted people to feel the integrity of the dishes. That is what I’ve used in comedy and food and wine to stay relevant and important and delicious and silly.

Q: What’s your take on salt? 

Wareheim: I mean, salt. You got to have salt. It’s a core element, but too much, and you’re in the doghouse, so it’s pretty simple. With comedy, you need the core ingredients. You need to season it properly. Same with food, but in comedy, if you hit it too hard, too long, if your timing’s off, if your intonation’s off too much, you can’t just add salt and make something good. It’s really got to be in balance. Everything is in balance.

Q: What’s your favorite dish, and how does it compare to your favorite joke? 

Wareheim: My favorite dish right now is beef bourguignon, and it’s been that for many years. I think it relates to jokes as in it’s very multilayered if you do it right, the French style, and take your time. There’s so many layers of flavor. If you cook your pearl onions in butter separately and then add them in at the end, there’s a reason all of that works. Same with comedy, it’s not just what’s on the surface; it’s the references, and it’s the feeling that you get like, oh, I know what they’re talking about. And sometimes it’s not often a mainstream thing, it’s something a little bit more personal, and it hits you on many levels. Same with cooking. Cooking is a multilevel thing.

Q: Can you share with us the secret sauce to being funny? 

Wareheim: That’s a great question, and I don’t know. I really don’t know. I think it’s just not caring to the right degree. You can’t be fully wackadoodle, but you need to trust yourself and put it all out there. I mean everything. Don’t care about what the critics think or your audience thinks or if you’re going to fail or succeed. That’s the kind of stuff I like.

Shawna Wagman
Shawna Wagman is a Creative Director on the Food & Bev team at Square. She helps put refreshingly easy technology in the hands of restaurant operators so they can spend less time in their messy back offices and show up for the fun parts.

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